I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Did I show you my penis last night?
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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