Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
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