my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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