the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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