I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Randomize
