3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
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