"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Randomize
