Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Randomize
