Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I didn't shave. On purpose
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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