I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
