I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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