I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
