we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
