Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I met the friendliest cop last night
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
