are you wasted or are you getting laid?
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wow
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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