She is in my trunk
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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