Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
