i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
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