Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
