I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
my liver is dry heaving
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
