just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Randomize
