can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
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