I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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