scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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