There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
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