I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
