in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
