As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
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