We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
