Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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