i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
