Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Randomize
