why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
