She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
