So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Someone shattered a urinal.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize
