His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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