And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
