Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
