The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
