I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
I just found puke in my bra..
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
