your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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