ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
