3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
