I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
She even gives head with a lisp.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize
