He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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