He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
My penis needs a shock collar
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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