That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
