She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
