He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
