Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
